Week Finisher

Or Finish-her. Shoutout to LH for this much needed clip in an otherwise mundane day.

What the... !??!?!?

From Monday's Paper:

Is 50 Cent being nickeled and dimed, or can he afford more child support for his 10-year-old son? That's the issue at hand for the rap star, who has been told by young Marquise Jackson's mother that $25,000 a month is not enough to cover household expenses.Fif is "worth tens and tens of millions of dollars," said Shaniqua Tompkins' attorney, Raoul Felder.

Seriously? What are you doing in your household, that $25k a month won't cover it? Even in my ballinest budget, say I'm spending 5k on rent, blowing 5 on random ish, dropping 1 on a car and insurance, and 1 to eat every month, that still leaves $13,000 a month to raise "young Marquise."

I'm having a Chris Rock moment over here.

Dynamic Duo

Am I the only one who thinks a Cee-Lo/Lauryn Hill collaboration would be (among) the hottest ish we ever heard?

Things That Need to Be Blogged About

In this issue:
I. Airport Update
II. All Things Horticultural
III. The Life and Times
IV. Case Logic All-Stars
V. Acknowledgments

Hello again folks. Time for the semi-annual all-in-one update. Enjoy!

I.Airport Update: Blogging Boston

I took my first trip through Boston's Logan Airport this week. A few observations:

A. The $40 flat fee cabs charge to get there from Cambridge is ridiculous, considering it can't be longer than a $25 ride. Cannot be. But... since I wasn't paying the fare, Logan only loses half a point for this one.

B. Why is the AirTran terminal downstairs in a corner instead of up with United, Jet Blue and the others? Is it because of the ugly "rush-hour" check-in line that AirTran apparently develops everyday between 3 and 6? Seriously?

C. As in, the C Terminal. As in... What the hell??? Three gates get their own terminal? I didn't see the D and E terminal, but I'm gonna go ahead and say they coulda thrown those three gates on the end of one of the others. Then maybe I coulda chosen between two restaurants. Not that I have anything against Uno's. Certainly not.

D. As in the grade I would give to the folks in Air Traffic Control, or whoever was responsible for boarding passengers on a flight they knew had no chance of leaving the airport anytime soon. Waiting on a "non-food carrier" for 4 hours before a 2.5 hour flight when there's food literally 30 seconds from the gate (the terminal is very small) is enough to make you snap on a flight attendant. I didn't though... we'll get to why a little later.

All in all, can't recommend Mr. Logan. Wouldn't say I hate it. Prolly wouldn't fly AirTran through there though.

II. All Things Horticultural

So this post is long overdue. It's publication date has been pushed back at least twice in the past year. First because I hesitate to blow up my tri-cons' lives on the blog. But I recently gave a subtle shout out to The Founder's Life, so this not-so-subtle post seems only fair. Second, any good journalist double-checks her facts before putting them in the street, and it took me a while to get back to the East Coast to confirm earlier observations.

Having done that though, I feel confident saying that the horticultural wisdom of a certain tri-con is at the top of the list of things that indeed "need to be blogged about." It began with the observation that the hook to Chris Brown's Wall to Wall is in fact (in fact), a perfectly accurate depiction of said tri-con's life. All ladies callin'. So endless was the parade of ladies at one point that he was moved to utter one of my favorite quotes from any human being ever, a remark about his incredible endowment of... ummm... land.

Strangely, with all that land, there didn't seem to be any crops springing up. So the question becomes what one grows on said land. Eventually, you (probably) have to commit to a crop and work with it, for life. In the meantime though, no point in letting the land go to waste. Might as well throw up a few trees. (Cherry trees, if I remember correctly.) Now, the tri-con, in his unfaltering modesty, might say that trees are somehow beneath crops. I disagree. Trees are more agreeable and less demanding than crops. No one ever wanted to kill their trees.

III. The Life and Times

Lingering for the moment on the subject of other people's lives, (and one person's Life in particular), I want to pose a question. If you went out for sushi and ordered nothing that cost more than $5, what are the chances that you wouldn't notice a random $23 charge in the middle of your bill? And when you did notice it, what are the chances you'd shrug off the overcharge, saying, "It (Life) all evens out in the end"? Now for Yours Truly, the chances are 0% and 0%. Maybe I'm just cheap (or poor) like that.

IV. Case Logic All-Stars

Normally, I would drop this in an AIM away message. I'm leaving it here for two reasons. 1. It gives me a chance to shout out a hometown artist. 2. The listed artists have really come through like champs during interesting times, so I'm giving em a more durable salute.

New Release on Rotation: R. Kelly - Double Up

There are probably no "classics" on this album. But it is entirely listenable and a perfect summer ride album. Recommended tracks: Hook it Up, Zoo, Rollin.

Old Release(s) on Rotation: Coldplay - X&Y; Death Cab for Cutie - Plans

I told someone recently that I have a hard time listening to R&B albums straight through because of the monotony of the subject matter (Love). Not that I have anything against it, but 12 straight tracks about man troubles is a bit much (for me). On the other hand, sometimes you want something mellow, and hip hop won't quite get it. So these albums are the perfect happy medium. You got your love tracks, your hate tracks, and your life tracks. Pleases all sides.

Slept on Release on Rotation: Cee-Lo - ... Soul Machine

Now (almost) everyone but me has known about this album for quite some time. I tend to sleep (literally and figuratively) for a long time before getting on anything new. I recently got on this. The upside of sleeping so long is that in the event of a drought of quality new releases, there's always 2-3 "old" albums waiting to be discovered. So in a way, it's like storing up musical food for the winter. (At least one tri-con knows about this.)

Not-So-Honorable Mention: Me - "Update Me"

This was the catchy little jingle I came up with waiting on the tarmac. Sung to the rhythm of "Upgrade U" (of course).

Pilot won't you updaaaaate me? / Estimate it maaaaaaaybe./ When we takin' off? I'm goin craaaaaaazy. / Updaaaaaaate me.

I promise you it was good for like 3 straight minutes of chuckles.

V. Acknowledgments

I would like to extend my sincere thanks to the following... First, my faithful friend the MTA, for knowing when you're needed and showing up, literally. You're the one thing in New York City that I'm perfectly happy to say is infinitely better than the Chicago version. Second, to ice cream. For being delicious even when you're not at your best. I never regret the time we spend together. Next, I actually want to apologize to the lovely recliner that showed me so much love during my stay. I slept on you for far too long, figuratively, because I never took the time to sleep on you literally. Now that I've had the pleasure, I just want to acknowledge your hospitality. I look forward to seeing you again. I also want to thank the upgrade to business class. Usually, for a 2-hour flight, just give me the cheapest seat. But for a 2-hour flight preceded by a 4-hour wait on the tarmac, the extra room (and attention) makes all the difference. So thank you upgrade. You're the best $40 I ever spent. Last but not least, as AirTran is a non-food carrier, I want to say thanks to the delicious Snickers that quieted my stomach rumblings during the wait. You said you would come through in my time of hunger. And you did.

So thanks to all of you for a wonderfully refreshing trip. Lord knows I needed it.

His Headline Reign Will Not Be Stopped

Sorry to go so sports-centric today, but Deadspin lead their inevitable Adam 'PacMan' Jones post today with this:

One would think that, after all that's gone down with him over the past year or so, PacMan Jones would steer clear of the following things:

• Strip clubs
• Entourages
• Guns
• Rain

Witnesses?

Excerpt from today's Monday Morning QB article by Peter King:

"There are approximately 113 million television households in the United States, and the average rating for the NBA Championship Series showed that 6.9 million of them watched the series between Cleveland and San Antonio.

Remember the late-night Monday night opener on ESPN last year between Oakland and San Diego? Awful game. San Diego won, 27-0. It was pretty much over at the half, when the Chargers led 13-0 and the Raiders couldn't get out of their own way on offense. That game - after a weekend that started with Thursday night football, went into Sunday afternoon football and Sunday night football, and had a Monday nighter before the second game on the West Coast - started at 10:25 p.m. EST and ended at 1:14 a.m. Tuesday. And it was on cable TV, which gets a lower rating anyway because not every TV household in America is wired for cable.

The Raiders-Chargers debacle was seen by 7.9 million American TV households.

We all know football is king in this country, but if the best the NBA has to offer gets trounced by the worst the NFL has to offer ... well, the NBA is in more than a little trouble."

Speaking of John Daly & Golf

John Daly was a good (re: honest) interview on 60 Minutes. He in totality and today's U.S. Open winner, Angel Cabrera, who had a few smokes during his final round win, are both strong cases that Golf is much more a game than a sport.

The Daly Show

John Daly, he of the troubled life, says his wife tried to stab him with a steak knife. Seemingly, just another day in the life of a celebrity/athlete...ho hum. BUT, he provided the following quote in a voicemail message to SI's Seth Davis. I think it should be shared, only because the finish is so succint; I wish I had such brevity.

"I just want my fans to know one thing — I am the victim in this," Daly said in a voicemail message left with SI.com's Seth Davis. "I was stabbed Thursday night of last week in my right cheek and clawed in my left cheek. She's saying it didn't happen. I want my fans to know it happened. I was the only one sober at this time. I just want the fans to know that I love them very much and my wife is a liar, a liar. I'm tired of being a victim of all this crap. She beats me up when I go to sleep. Every time I go to sleep she throws her fists on me. I just married the wrong woman."

And that's that.

Caution: Very Disturbing

All Things Political, vol. 4.1

So if anyone remembers how perplexed I was to realize that I would seriously consider not voting for Barack, even though he's black, then you can imagine how perplexed I am now that I'm seriously considering voting for Ron Paul, even though (15 years ago) he may or may not have been less than fond of black people.

And I love black people (... really, I do. I know that was in question at one point.) It just seems like every time the man opens his mouth, sense falls out. First at the Republican debates, then on Bill Maher, then on the Daily Show, then on Tucker Carlson. I mean if for no other reason than that substantive disagreement is necessary for progress, Ron Paul is good for American politics. Even if he were 90% wrong (which he's not), he'd be one of the best things to happen to mainstream politics in the last 20 years.

Unfortunately, I have no evidence that he'd actually make a good president. At least, though, I don't think he'd make a stupid one, which is a decent start.

Just in case anyone is disinclined to click any of the links, I'm including this one in the post for good measure. Click it.

Untitled, vol. 1

I've decided to start blogging some of the randomness that I come across in my passionate pursuit of procrastination. Normally, I'd say to myself, Self, it's possible that no one will find this interesting but you, and refrain from posting. But what the hey... If a Generalist can't be random, who can be? Haven't decided what to call this little series yet, but I'm working on it.

The first installment: Bill Tancer's observations on the rise of Google in the current issue of Time magazine, which includes...

Google, in its transition from a noun to a verb, has become more than a tool to find information online, it's quickly becoming the default tool to navigate the web, replacing the browser URL bar as the way to move from one website to the next. How do we know this? The secret to Google's primary use can be found in the top searches that people enter on the site. The #1 term, representing over 4% of all U.S. searches on Google, is for the site that surpassed Google last summer to become the most popular domain on the Internet, "MySpace." In fact 17 of the top 20 searches on Google are searches for the other leading Internet sites such as "ebay," "yahoo," and "mapquest." The most puzzling search term that Internet users enter into a Google searchbox is the 14th most popular term: "Google." (In case you're keeping count, the three most popular terms that are not websites are: porn, free porn and lyrics.)

Now, it's possible that the only reason I find this interesting is that the whole "go to Google to get to MySpace" thing is really impressive to me. I mean, how hard is it to type "myspace" or "yahoo" into an address bar? Not terribly hard. It'd be like if someone was trying to get to the university's website and typed "puff" into a search engine. Because they know I'm heavy on campus like that. Or, it'd be like if I worked for some really prestigious company, and people searched for the company website using my name almost as often as they used the actual name of the company. I'm just saying...

(Sidenote: Google's hybrid map function is freakin ridiculous, though the jury's still out on the street view.)

This Is Unbelievable

This is Serena Williams, supposedly. I believe this, but then, I don't. Here is the Deadspin post. Here is the original AOL Fanhouse post which included this aside: "(Warning: we're told there's language in the song. We can't hear it, but then again, we're from Atlanta. Hip-hop profanity doesn't even register on our radar.)" That was funny to me. Otherwise, I'll let the video do the clappi...err...talking.

ATL Shawty

So I don't log flight miles like the other contributors, but every now and then I get through a new airport. Not enough to make my own Airport List, but enough to drop 2 cents here and there.

Most recently I ended up in Atlanta. Piggy-backing Aristocrates' observations, the re-charging station is ingenious indeed. I was pretty impressed when I saw it. Never been to Chick-Fil-A, so that one doesn't do anything for me. Those connecting delays though...

It started with the destination. Trying to fly to Memphis, well, Good Luck. Southwest doesn't fly there which almost automatically means you're paying more than you want to pay. The major airlines start at $200 roundtrip, which doesn't sound terrible... but when you consider that I can fly to Cali for the same price, it kinda hurts my feelings. Based on the distance (1 hour, 40 minute flight), Memphis should be about $80 each way.

Then, I must have been flying at a bad time because the (late) flights I wanted were all like $283. At the last minute, AirTran had a sale so I got a one-way for $128 after taxes/fees. Of course, AirTran, which could just as accurately call itself InefficiencyTran, sends everything through Atlanta. So you usually have the luxury of flying past your destination before you fly to it. Add a weather delay and of course my flight gets to Atlanta 10 minutes after my flight to Memphis leaves. (I'm tempted to complain about the insanely long 1.2 mile walk from the terminal to the baggage claim, but they got this train system that runs like every 2 minutes, so its cool.)

On the bright side, I got a chance to check out the Heavenly Bed at the Westin. Maybe I'm not a bed person (although I'm definitely a sleep person) because I couldn't tell what the big deal was. And they have these comforters that are so heavy you feel like you're climbing under a lead blanket... like that gray thing the dentist lays on you before he takes your x-rays. Not sure what's up with that. Otherwise, a pretty smooth trip, with a not-bad-at-all 8-hour drive back to save funds.

Speaking of which, I'd like to pause for a moment in remembrance of the $50 I gave up last time I filled my tank. Do you know how many things I won't pay $50 for? Not sure what's going on, but we're lookin at 3.89 for regular unleaded. Now that hurts my feelings.

Game Theory

An excerpt from my homie's blog...

Background: He was at an ER conference and his residency program was competing against 5 others in a game of ER Jeopardy...

So, final jeopardy comes around, our team has 3000, the next closest has 2200. The subject is toxicology. One of our third years is going into toxicology. We start the victory celebration. Wager 1500.

Question: What mushroom toxicity requires vitamin B6 to blah, blah, blah?

No freaking clue. No problem. Everyone else is clueless too. Let's just put the one mushroom everyone knows and hope for the best. Of course, everyone gets it wrong, but Wash U, the 2200, bet nothing. Genius. i say genius because I know the guy who probably made that call and he was probably scheming the whole time. If they bet to win and knew the answer, we would probably know it too, and you could just pay attention to the game to judge that our knowledge was more or less equal. If they bet to win and got it wrong, whether we got it right or wrong, we would win. They could either bet to win, get it right and hope we got it wrong (less likely if they thought we were about equal) or bet nothing and hope the question is hard enough that everyone flounders. Genius.

Now that is game theory.

When A Picture Tells It All

Now, I'm not a LBJ fan in anyway but this is a pretty representative picture of last night events. One (the) Cavalier and five Pistons, the latter whom all aren't really doing any-significant-thing. Does it really take 5?

And for the hell of it, peep Penny Hardaway's back-to-back box scores against the #1 defense in the league in 1997. Also, peep his teammates. Round 1, Game 3. Round 1, Game 4 (I believe he scored 16 straight in this game). And I'm definitely not a Penny fan.